Saturday, 26 December 2009

New Year

So I've started thinking about the new year, and doing that thing I always do and assume everyone else does, where I think about what a waste of time last year was and how next year would probably be better if I wasn't so rubbish.

Well this year, I'm feeling a bit better. I mean don't get me wrong, I've not achieved much I wanted to. I'm not published and nobody reads anything I write, but hey, so what, right? Let's look at the steps forward and back.

Forward:

I started this website and blog in this year, I illustrated the whole thing and created a catalogue of work. I wrote a first draft of a novel and I created a brand for myself. I finally cut my hair short after years of wavering, I got a high second class degree and started full time work. I also, pleasantly, lost over half a stone. I got an iPhone and went on holiday and read absolutely loads. I had lunch in Cafe M, and all in all, material things aside, I've been pretty damned happy.

Backward:

I sent out about 40 postcards to agents and heard back from 4 who turned me down, nobody reads my website or blog, I'm nervous of self promotion and feel like I've achieved nothing this year despite the above. I give up too easily and I get scared too quickly. I know what I want but have no idea how to get it, and am too scared to try.

Hmm. Well on balance, I've done better than I thought, and everything that was bad mainly stems from my own crushing lack of self-worth. Hmm. Am currently considering New Year's resolutions.

In new year news. Guin isn't going too well. I know what's going to happen, but it's a matter of getting there. It's still going to be published, and come out on either Sunday night or Monday morning, every week.

Just so you know, it's about fairy tales and being twisted.

In other, brief news, I read this month's Vogue this morning and noticed for the first time just how appallingly thin some of the catwalk models are. I didn't see the clothes, just the haunting sunken cheeks and spidery fleshless limbs of the beautiful people showing clothes off to their best. Was shocked. I mean, we all want to be thinner, but this is wrong, surely. If you have a copy, I direct you to the bottom left corner of page 33.

Monday, 21 December 2009

A few bits

Can you believe I am still being royally messed about by fluishness? Had three days off work last week. Am struggling to hear out of one or other ear at any given time. Use the opportunity to whisper about me but for the love of GOD, don't try and tell me anything important in hushed tones.

It's been snowing, as it has everywhere, but looks like it's stopped and is beginning to melt. Have been most amused by seeing my friends fall over in the snow, and if that makes me a bad person, so be it!

In other news, I have *attempted* to put an ad in the yellow pages. Pending.

Guin, now. Ah, Guin. I am beginning to worry about Guin. He is a troublesome sod. I'm hoping he'll turn out right in the end but at the moment he's mucking me about and being a little bastard. Oh well, I've got over a week to give him a bit of a kick.

Oh, and Happy Christmas!

Saturday, 12 December 2009

Flu, Dragonforce and Guin

Meh, I say. Or I would say, if I could speak.

You know of the cold, but I then went and shouted along to Dragonforce playing at the Engine Shed on Thursday, which was TEH AWESOME but has somewhat exacerbated the whole throat thing... now I can't speak. Duno why the rest of my cold got inexplicably and hugely worse at the same time, but nonetheless, I was alright at work on Friday and then today I am 97% mucus. Gross, but true!

So yes, that's what has been happening this week: I went to see Dragonforce which was BRILLO, and by crikey there was an AWFUL LOT of hair there. And a lot of awful hair, but I digress.

Is it just me or are mosh pits stupid? I'm told there are three types, and I witnessed two at the gig - the circular running one and the one where you run into someone, knock them down, help them up, and do it again. I hid behind some burly looking men until they stopped.

Sabaton, (I think that's how they're spelt) were lovely and good and all things fun, and then Dragonforce were... AWESOME. I heart cheesy epic goth metaly music heavily featuring the following words;

Fire, flames, wasteland, spirit, fight, soul, eternity... well you get the idea with that.

The current lack of voice was bloody worth it.

On to actual writerly news, and I've been thinking about the new serial New Year's Resolution ridiculously long story.

It's going to be called, as the title of this post suggests, 'Guin'. I've got a vague idea of the icon for it at the moment so I need to get that done at some point soon, but haven't yet decided how to publish it. It could either be as a blog post every week or I could upload onto the site every week. Blog would obviously be easier but not so smugly swish... Hmm, I'll think about it. I kind of don't want to clog up the blog with story, that's what the website's for.

I've started writing the story in readiness since it always pays to be prepared and I don't reeeeeally think it's cheating. Anyhoo, I've only managed a rubbish 250 words so I'm not getting that much of a head start.

As before, more details as and when I think of them.

Tuesday, 8 December 2009

Neeeews

Hello there.

While not completely recovered from the ever-recurring winter blues (walking to work in the dark is just WRONG), I am all a-quiver with new year plans.

Since Nanowrimo was so frikkin awesome, and I've been feeling at something of a loose end since it ended (OK, for just over a week, but frankly that's too long), I've decided to embark on a (foolish, over-ambitious) project for the new year...

Basically, in a nutshell quivering with barely suppressed excitement and anticipation, starting in the first week of the new year (specific day TBC), I'm going to be posting 2000 words a week of an ongoing story, like a serial. Updates will be on Facebook and Twitter, I haven't completely worked out the logistics yet since I only decided to do it today, but if I announce it on here, I have to do it.

Is it wrong I'm seeing it as a creepy, weekly version of the Archers? I mean, it won't be, but that's how I'm fondly imagining it.

So yeah, more news on that as I think of it....:S

Saturday, 5 December 2009

Bit depressed, really.

I’ve been thinking about life quite a bit recently.

The thing of it is that if you don’t believe in God, and you don’t believe in fate or destiny, what is there? I work an eight to five job five days a week. I’m bored at work and wish entire days away. When I get home I’m too tired to do anything constructive and I spend my weekends sleeping or listening to gothic metal so I can pretend I‘m the hero of some kind of epic quest, when really I‘m popping out for milk.

So I have started to wonder what it is we are here for and what it is we are supposed to do. The sad conclusion I came to, pessimistic atheist that I am, was that we aren’t here for anything. Which is a little disconcerting to say the least. We as a people are a tiny, insignificant and purposeless collection of dots on a planet orbiting one of an infinite number of suns in a space so large it is beyond our comprehension.

And I have a cold.

Thursday, 26 November 2009

Finished.

As you can see from the gratuitously smug picture on the side of this post, I've done Nanowrimo. Thank god.

It hasn't sunk in yet that the mammoth task is over. It's a little disheartening how crap I think everything I've written is (and let me tell you, I think it's dire), but heck, that's why it's a first draft, right?

This time four weeks ago I didn't have anything but an idea, and now, 26 days later, I've got a 50,318 word document, and however shoddy, it's something. And now I shall have an extra two hours a night free in which to do... well, bugger all at first probably, but eventually, something else.

Once I've recovered, I may even go back to it...

But seriously, I've really enjoyed myself, exhaustion and frustration and guilt and self-doubt aside. I hope it's taught me something other than 'why use one word when twelve will do?', since I've loved having something on the go all the time, and the fact it's been a tight, ridiculous deadline has really spurred me on to do it and got me used to working consistently on something daily. Truth be told, however smug this makes me sound, I'm proud of myself for writing 50,000 words worth of twaddle.

Sunday, 22 November 2009

Same old same old.

Still doing Nanowrimo. Meh. It isn't that I'm sick of it because I am enjoying doing it very much, it's more that I'm concerned it's an enormous pile of tripe...

Still, on 42K as of this evening, so only 8 more to go!:o

Just had a nice long weekend, had Friday off from work so it's been lie-ins a go-go!

Not looking forward to getting up early tomorrow, but what can you do? Am feeling a bit meh about everything at the moment, work, life, bleh. Still, I'm sure I'll cheer up soon, I always do.

Slightly depressing blog here, sorry about that, best keep it short in that case. Will update on Nanowrimo shortly when I've passed the 50K mark; hopefully in 4 days!

See the link below for my Nanowrimo page, click the stats tab for an awesome Dave Gorman-esque graph :D

http://www.nanowrimo.org/eng/user/532733

Monday, 16 November 2009

Well, I said I'd blog.

I wrote 4500 words last night, in an unexpected flurry of activity. I started by struggling to do one and a half thousand, then decided to try for two, at which point it seemed logical to try for three, at which point I got a little carried away and realised I'd nearly reached 30,000 words total so I may as well go for it!

Upside: several days ahead in Nanowrimo, reached the scary peak of 30K, totally psyched.

Downside: so psyched I couldn't sleep, very very tired all day at work (many cups of tea helped though) and so only managed a measley 600 tonight. Meh.

Much as I'm enjoying it, I'll be glad when it's over. I want to write, I love writing, and I love doing this. But now my love has been, if not precisely rekindled, then the gas has been turned up higher, I want to write more and different things as well! I want to do articles and more shorts and TEH BIG STOREH who has been more than usually neglected of late. I'm just over half way through the month now, and I'm itching to do more! If only there were more hours in the day. Mind, I'd probably spend them all sleeping.

Sunday, 15 November 2009

Blog

I forgot to do a blog today.

Bugger.

I'll do one tomorrow, probably.
(My excuse is that I was writing, so I don't feel too bad)

Monday, 9 November 2009

All Sorts of Stuff

Last week was a depressing and stressy week of annoyance and b*llocks. Yes, b*llocks, but at least I censored it. Last weekend, however, was a beautiful isolated glade of loveliness, in which myself and Kaleidoscope Alchemist went to stay in a beautiful B&B in Mablethorpe for three nights. It was the Cross Guest House and is quite simply one of the nicest places ever.

Nanowrimo wise, it's going OK. There were a few days last week where I couldn't bring myself to do any but right now I'm on 19,000 words which is about a day ahead of where I should be so I'm pretty happy with that. The actual story is a pile of unmitigated balls, but can I expect any more from what is essentially speed writing?

Balls aside, I officially heart Nanowrimo. Even though it's stressy and it takes at least an hour and a half every day when I'm knackered, and even though I kinda hate what I'm writing, I'm still so glad I'm doing it and I look forward to doing it again. I feel like I'm learning an awful lot from it, and that's really the point. Yay!

I recently ended a post bigging up Hula Hoops and Kitkat caramels. This week I end with being annoyed with the Jane Austen Centre.

Anyone who knows me knows I'm an enormous regency bore, and that I can't get enough of the stuff. Which make my intense dislike of the Jane Austen Centre even more worthy of comment, I think. I don't know why I'm still on their mailing list, I guess I enjoy being outraged by the fact that they wouldn't help me with my dissertation (bitter much?), yet they will peddle any vaguely Austen-related crap to squeeze a few more pennies out of one who is already one of the world's most popular authors. Hang your head in shame, Jane Austen Centre. And stop selling so much rubbish.

Saturday, 31 October 2009

NaNoWriMo

Yeah, so I'm a NaNoWriMo bore now. Woe, woe.

Ten minutes to go..

:O

Would it be an appalling waste of money for me to buy a £200 netbook so I have a more portable laptop and can write on the go? I do think netbooks look a bit silly when people write on them because they're so small and I have enough trouble typing on a full sized keyboard but.... I dunno, am trying not to impulse buy since I can't officially afford it...

Right, I'm off to start warming up my fingers - wish me luck!

Sunday, 25 October 2009

Sunday & Julia Quinn

Thank heavens for the extra hour!

Have gone from being a website bore to a NaNoWriMo bore, woe, woe. But but but, it starts a week today and I am very excited, dying to start! As far as I remember the rules say you can plan as much as you want to as long as you don't write any of the actual novel before the 1st November. I've kinda planned the bare bones but, inkeeping with the rushed and experimentary nature of the whole thing, I'm going to try to do a lot of it off the cuff. Hmm, hope that works.

It's going to be a slightly fantasy-based idea, different to everything on the website, but it reminds me of a fantasy I spent my A-Levels writing instead of revising... That took longer than a month but it was about the same length (45,000 words ish) and I worked on it pretty much every day. It was a pile of rubbish but still, a learning curve. Likewise was the first full length (75,000 words) novel I wrote which took me two or three years on and off and was, bluntly, pretentious rubbish. But we live we learn, and by crikey do I feel like I learned a lot from writing that. It was a regency romance (of course!) in a similar vein to the more pompous eighties Mills and Boon and Silhouette romances my sister and I found in the attic.

From starting off stilted and awkward, it goes on to take itself too seriously and then ends with chattering tearyness. I plan to rewrite it one day, maybe make it readable, haha.

One of the reasons I realised, re-reading it a year later (it was called Summer at Staynthroppe, by the way, a pompous title but I always struggle with titles) that it was a bundle of tripe, was because I had since discovered the wonderful loveliness of Julia Quinn. She writes regency romances which, unlike a lot of others out there, are incredibly relatable. The books are written relatively informally but without talking down to the reader.

Her most famous works are probably the Bridgerton series, a delightful set of interweaving stories based around the Bridgerton family, darlings of high society London, and the various romances of the eight adult children of the family. Before this turns into a love letter to Ms Quinn I feel I must add that while all her books are different they can be a tad formulaic, as well as more than a bit unbelievable, just as any book within that genre can be. Yet the point of the best of this genre is escapism, not realism. If I want historical accuracy and realism I will read a history book. If I want a real sense of romance and regency fantasy I will look no further than here. Comforting reads, less like junk food and more like a big bowl of homemade soup, these are entertaining and exciting, with likeable characters and laugh-out-loud humour. Highly recommended, as I'm sure you can tell.

And I end on that happy note to try and re-jig the current Teh Big Storeh (see, I always struggle with titles!) and get on with some actual writing, not just rambling.

PS, I hope that whoever it was that thought of bringing out star-shaped hula hoops for Christmas got a promotion. They're awesome! Same applies to caramel Kitkats.

Tuesday, 20 October 2009

Postcards

Not precisely worth waiting for, but as promised!


Am feeling distinctly more chipper, had NaNoWriMo revelation - only ten more days to go!!

-- Posted from my iPhone

Monday, 19 October 2009

Hmm..

Am not feeling too chipper.

Website is up, have written a heap for it, have had postcards printed, started sending them off to agenty-types in that London. Am going to sign up for NaNoWriMo, which involves writing a 50,000 word novel in a month, and takes place in November.

Am scared.

This seems like the kind of thing a proper, real and actual person would do. Not NaNoWriMo, although yes, that too, but in general the whole following the dream, trying to make it and be successful, imagining people would actually want to read what you write is... overwhelming when you only had 4 hours of sleep last night.

Expect a slightly out of focus iPhone picture of my new postcards, professionally laid out on my keyboard, the north and south wallpaper just visible on the screen. In case you were wondering, it's of Mr Thornton looking cross in a mill.

I'm going to go to bed now. I think that's the best thing to do, will feel better in the morning.

Zzzzzzzzzz

Sunday, 11 October 2009

Website-a-go-go

As you can tell by the header on this page, the website it well and truly up! Phew.

Getting postcards and business cards printed next week hopefully, and bought the Writer's Handbook 2010 so yeah... lots still to do!

Best get on with it, really...

Sunday, 4 October 2009

Sort of almost nearly there...

It had been a busy week this week in Miss H land. There was work, and there have been parties and house guests and all things knackering. Hence why I'm blogging from in bed, from which I hope not to rise for quite some time...

Work wise, (because let's not forget that's what we're here for!) I finished short number one (yay!) with a surprising swiftness and that means I only have one more to finish and a chapter to polish before the website can be uploaded and I can finally feel like I've achieved something over the last few months rather than just wasting my time. Start to finish, from no back catalogue of work I'm prepared to share to a website full, this will have taken about six months, if I meet my deadline. When I say I'm prepared to share a website full though it means less that I think everything I do is awesome and more "well I don't absolutely hate it..."

But enough, I suppose I really ought to get up...


-- Posted from my iPhone

Sunday, 27 September 2009

Websitey things

Yeah yeah so all I ever do is go on about the website. I'm a website BORE. Well, hopefully not for too much longer! It's pretty much almost nearly done! Yay! I've put it all together on dreamweaver, it works (yay) and all it's waiting for is two stories I haven't finished yet and a re-jigged chapter one of TEH BIG STOREH. And I am going to start working on those things this evening. Sort of now, really. So that's all very exciting. Feeling a lot better about it all now.

In other news , mostly to show I do other things than go to work and talk about my website, I went to my first ever gig yesterday. It was a weird mix of indie stuff, weird stuff and thrashy metally stuff. It was really good! It wasn't heaving, but there were five different acts on and I pretty much blanket liked them all. My faves were White on White (who gave me two free CDs, yay!) and Nightvision, who everyone knows are awesome. They were the highlight of the night and there was loads of headbanging. I think it's a sign that I'm an outsider to the whole metal scene that I find several people headbanging next to each other funny. And that I find it even funnier watching burly men headbanging into the centre of a circle they've created by linking arms. Is it wrong I hoped they'd crack heads?

I got trampled by groupies despite their being loads of room (there weren't many people there) and come ON, an apology and STOPPING DOING IT would've been nice...
But I'm starting to sound bitter (rather than just squashed and trodden on) and it really was loads of fun.

So back on to my hobby horse, hopefully the site will be finished soon, I've given myself a deadline of the end of October to finish it, which is do-able, I reckon. That means after that I have less than two months to meet the *TEH BIG STOREH first draft finished by Xmas* deadline. Which is distinctly less do-able... I'm extending it to the end of the year and crossing my fingers...

Tuesday, 22 September 2009

Things I've done.

It has been ages (literally, decades or eons or something) since I did a non-i-phone blog entry. And typing is SO MUCH EASIER on a keyboard than a phone, even if it IS qwerty.

Well, I did a bunch of stuff. All images for the website are completed and have been correctly sized. I have designed the front of 6 business/post cards and have just spent HOURS (that felt like eons) drawing and colouring in some more text for business/post cards. GAH. Oh, the pain of my misshapen, claw-like hand. I may never hold a pen again.

The *still-to-do* list grows though, I need to scan in the stuff I've just drawn, do an avatar, sort out the facebook page, as well as, ya know, do some ACTUAL WRITING for the first time in WEEKS (eons).

Lots of capitals in this post. Lots of EMPHASIS. I am in the mood to emphasise. I cannot emphasise enough. Indeed.

Feeling bad I haven't actually written parts of my actual stories for what must be a few weeks now. I did a bit, but then got cross and ripped it out and tore it up and since then... gah. This website thing is stressing me out, it's such a mountain to climb, I feel like I can't actually do anything that isn't getting the website off the ground because if I don't it will never get done. I seem to have missed the point that I need to finish writing stuff for it before I can launch it, but hey, try telling me that, I won't listen!

Hopefully set to start building the website (a presumably long and weary process) over the next week or so. I'm told that once I get the basic layout for all the pages done, it'll be a lot easier and quicker, so yay for that!

As far as the stories go, once I get back into it it should be ok, I mean I know what's guna happen in them so it's a matter of figuring out the minutiae and just writing the damned things. As far as websitery goes the Xmas deadline is well on target, but the first draft of the novel is... unlikely. Damn the full time job I have to go to in order to finance this! Oh well, I'm feeling pretty proud of how much I've done tonight, so onwards and upwards and whatnot.

Monday, 14 September 2009

Well.

Well! I tweeted (yes, tweeted -get me!) at some point last weekend that I was too ashamed and embarassed to blog because I didn't really have anything to blog about. Yeah, I'd been doing little bits of work here and there but nothing that really amounted to anything. Well.

On Sunday I spent the afternoon working on illustrations and links for the website, and before I knew it they were all done! Sure, they need cropping and jpeg-ing and saving and organising and whatnot, but the actual hard thinky bit it is all done! It would seem that the little bits here and there added up without me realising and yeah, shazam, tis done! Website-wise nothing will be actually going online for a good while yet. Being as I am almost completely HTML-illiterate, I can do nothing without N's help and the schedule isn't clear until mid next week. This does however give me over a week to proof everything and hopefully get a bit nearer finishing two more shorts and planning teh big storeh.

So it's all very exciting! Also in the pipeline is designing business cards and postcards to send out when I start promoting, but I'm already stuck on what to put on them. How do you sell yourself without sounding like a smug idiot? Answers on a freshly designed postcard...


-- Posted from my iPhone

Tuesday, 8 September 2009

Excited midweek post

O my, I am all exuberant and happy! I just saw Julie&Julia, and it was fab! It was just so lovely and inspiring and it made me feel like the whole writer goal thing was actually achievable.

My friend got free tickets to a preview of it and kindly invited me along. It was awesome! I don't just wana go on a rant about it, and the only follower I have is about to get an earful of all this anyway! But suffice to say, I feel inspired, and I feel capable, and I feel hopeful.

Yay for a midweek boost!

Sunday, 6 September 2009

Links and whatnot

Another week, another bit of stuff gets done, and I still have an ENORMOUS mountain to climb before I'm even ready to start putting the site together. This week, however, I am happily at the foot of a slightly smaller mountain:) I've done all the lettering I need (for now) for links and titles and things. Every story is going to have a hand-drawn starting letter and I haven't done that yet, but other than that, all that still needs doing is the illustrations. I've done one already which I'm pretty pleased with (see end of blog for preview) and hopefully the others will run as smoothly. Other than that, all that remains is to do more writing!

In other news, I graduate tomorrow, so there's that university malarky over and done with! Here's looking forward to a fun-filled week next week, and plenty of work getting done!

Yours hopefully,
Miss H, Ba (Hons) :p




-- Post From My iPhone

Monday, 31 August 2009

Actual Happenings

Unusually, things have actually been happening with the whole "I wana be a writer" thing, and still more unusually, it is ACTUAL things rather than things in my head. Yes, things.

So many things in fact that I was almost going to do an emergency midweek blog. I decided against it but then forgot to blog all weekend until right at the end of the bank holiday :s my bad. But on with the things! I have a new logo, v exciting! Had an about turn on the site recently, completely replanned it which has seen me deciding to do all illustrations etc myself. It's going to be largely (if not entirely) black and white, and very big on hand drawn text. I love hand drawn text. I love drawing text. Yay!

So anyway, after much umming and aahing and pondering and worrying for about a fortnight, I have finally done my header, my first illustration, a business card design, and half of my links. Much black ink has been used!

It's taking forever and I must be what, 15% up the website mountain, and feeling like I can't really justify writing again until it's ready to launch. This is all somewhat disheartening, particularly since the lovely N has redone his website almost entirely in a matter of days! That said, now I know what I'm doing with it, and it's just a matter of sitting down and getting on with it, it's an enormous weight off my mind!

So watch this space, basically. Website is on target, and as such so is the launch of the corresponding facebook page, business cards, and all other promotional whatnots. Only thing I'm behind with now is Teh Big Storeh. Eep! My Christmas deadline for that is looking slightly unlikely.... But I shall prevail! Hopefully!

I leave you with a sneak peek of the new header, enjoy:)


-- Post From My iPhone

Sunday, 23 August 2009

Websitery

It's all change at the moment in camp MissHwrites what with the websiteryness that's been going on. Shame about the distinct lack of writing, by gosh, but I say that every week.

This week has been considerably taken up with website overhaul rethink whatnot and I am considerably happier with what's going on with it now, and am in line to get the site underway in the next few weeks. To be honest it's been worrying me that I've got no actual Thing to show for the work I've been doing and so getting something out there will just be such a weight off my mind. As such the site is very much number one priority at the moment. Gaaaaaaaaaaaah!


-- Post From My iPhone

Saturday, 15 August 2009

Not too much, really

Yeah, another week another blog, not too much to report, alas! God, I'm always so tired! Done a few stories, bit of website plannery, not too much, nothing finished or completed which makes it seem like iv done even less than the small amount iv actually done! Which has been typing stuff up, mostly.

One week is blurring into another at the moment, usual problems of not enough sleep and what have you, but hopefully things will sort themselves out soon and I'll get into more of a work-then-write routine. Fingers crossed!


-- Post From My iPhone

Saturday, 8 August 2009

Yaaaaaaaawn

Well it is Saturday and as such must be blog time (hurrah!). But frankly it feels like far too early in the morning to be blogging anything. I know I say this all the time (broken record) but work is bloody tiring!

Er writing update-wise I can't remember what I wrote last week... *checks* ah yes!

Well since then domain name is bought, loose ends on two shorts tied up and finished, started a new one, planned (a bit) my next five shorts but alas and alack, no real planning on Teh Big Storeh:( It sounds like I've done quite a bit but I really haven't. None of that stuff took very long and oh dear.... I have just realised all my blog ever amounts to is me moaning about not having done enough work..

Wel, tis the weekend now so no excuses!

In other news the meal was delish last weekend and both myself and N highly reccomend Crust in Lincoln. It's always nice to go somewhere a bit alternative...



-- Post From My iPhone

Saturday, 1 August 2009

s'alright

Do you know, I have been using my iPhone for worky things.

I did some research on it, I wrote some notes on it, and yesterday, on my lunch hour I edited and retyped on it. <3 I think it's love...

In other news, I'm going to try and finally pull some things together. I shall hopefully neatly finish 2 shorts today, begin to plan a third, plan some more on Teh Big Storeh, and I have already started planning blogsite layout (need to buy domain name) and thinking how many pics I will need to commission, sharpish. This feels good, this feels like progress, this feels (unlike it has previously, in more depressed moments) as if my Christmas deadline isn't laughably stupid. It sort of is since part of me wants to entirely re-write the 14,000 words I already have of Teh Big Storeh, draft one. I think I will. Hence why I need a plan, more than a vague idea and a previous plan...

Going out for dinner tonight (need to book restaurant) and about town this afternoon, walking and so on, buying parents birthday presents etc etc. The weekends and evenings mean so much when they're the only time you can call your own.

Hurray for Saturday!

Sunday, 26 July 2009

iPhonery and getting paid

I went and got an iPhone when I got paid this week. Perhaps an individual with greater restraint would have waited until, say, her blogsite was up and running before she felt she had earned such a fabulous toy as this. Lucky for me, I felt no such qualms. Unfortunately now the deed is done I feel a bit guilty that my writing career hasn't come to such a point where I can justify having earned this. To sort of try and make up for this, I'm blogging off my iPhone now to justify getting it.

The thing is that I haven't really done a lot of writing since I started work. I've done a bit on a few lunch hours but once I'm home, by god I'm tired. Also had a lot on my mind at the moment so my priorities have been a bit different lately. Yeah, excuses excuses, I hear ya.

But in my guilt I've written quite a bit today and it's made me feel pretty good. The lunch hours I've spent writing have given me such a good feeling, such a sort of buzz, I just wish I wasn't so tired all the time!

This rambling blog and the quite productive day I've had today have made me feel a lot better; I am a proper person who does proper things and doesn't just doss about all day playing on her new phone. Probably...

Apologies if this doesn't make a lot of sense, but being a proper person with an 8 to 5 job is really tiring! I'm going to google some weird things now, all in the name of research... I wish I could tell you but it would ruin the endings of what I'm writing at the moment!


-- Post From My iPhone

Saturday, 18 July 2009

Stuff is most definitely happening...

I love the word *definitely*. It is a beautiful word, it takes no prisoners (except those who cannot spell it), and when you use it, you promise to deliver. It has the power of conviction and means what it says. Yes, I love the word *definitely*.

As such, when I say "my blogsite will definitely be up and running before Christmas", that means I ABSOLUTELY HAVE TO do it. Don't get me wrong, I want to do it, I'm wishing it would be done sooner but here's the thing: I'm scared. If I do this thing, and it's crap, I will have failed. However, if I do nothing and nothing happens to me and I don't get to be a writer, I never have to face up to the fact I'm potentially rubbish. I won't have failed because I never tried.

I tried to be an illustrator, and for a long time my bent ran towards all things painting and drawing. I have since completed my degree (2-1, yay!) and in the course of doing the whole thing realised I was a bit rubbish and can't actually do it (the only reason I got a 2-1 is because of the lengthy dissertation which pulled my grade up). I sort of wasted 4 years of my life pursuing an art career when all along what I should have been doing was writing. I was writing at the same time, but it's not the same.

So you see, I already know what it's like to realise everything you're doing is wrong. It's scary. I was in denial for about a year and a half that I was doing the wrong thing, because realising you've set your path in the wrong direction is scary, especially when you're in the middle of a three year course.

At the beginning of the third year I finally admitted I was doing the wrong thing, and one of the things that made me realise I was kidding myself was looking at the work of one of my friends on the course. She was doing what I wished I could but wasn't able to. I'd got to a point where whenever I was working I would rather be reading or writing, and it was hard to fight.

Taking all this into consideration, I decided against illustrating the blogsite - I had a go but things weren't exactly how I wanted them, and I don't have the skills to make it right.... So, I've asked Kirsty to do them for me!

Like me she graduates this year, and like me is just starting out doing her stuff, but her website is already some kind of awesome, and I've asked her if I can commission her to do a few pics for me when I've a bigger catalogue of work over the coming months:)

You can check out some of her work here:
http://www.kirstymordaunt.co.uk

In other news (briefly) I started work, it's good because it's money and it's nice to meet new people, and it motivates me because I don't want to be doing it for ever (oh, but I'm just so passionate about admin!) but sweet mercy am I tired...

ZZZzzzzzzzzzzzz

Saturday, 11 July 2009

Some stuff

Some stuff: it's my birthday. woo.

Other stuff: I start work on Monday... yay for getting paid!

Some other stuff: I've done some sort of actual work. A bit of drawing here and there, and OH GOOD HEAVENS, had a major, MAJOR breakthrough in the plot of TEH BIG STOREH (as I think I shall now refer to it by). It's nice cos I've been worried about this, but finally I have a sort of secondary plot THING which makes it more of a well rounded... THING. Yes, I'm really working the English language hard today...

Er, other other stuff: I have set myself a deadline, and if I put it up here, I have, HAVE to meet it... I want the blogsite (schmogsite) up and running, with stories and illustrations on it by XMAS... which sounds like a long time but I'm including my TEH BIG STOREH in it, current length 14,000 words, I want at least my first draft done by then.... eep. Well that's.... 5 months 2 weeks... better get started then!

But first, because it's my birthday, I'm going to the pub :)

Sunday, 5 July 2009

Enormous Boons

You know what they say about things happening in groups? Bad things happen in threes, apparently, do good things as well? Well what with the job joy, the depression lifted and I managed to start writing again:D Hence, enormous boon!

I finished a story I'd started a while ago, I don't know if I like it or not, I wrote two alternate endings and am awaiting feedback from trusted associates as to whether it should be binned or not. Also started another story which I'm rather more fond of, but give it time, I'll hate it in the long run I'm sure...

Re: designing the blogsite, I haven't really done anything with it, feeling a bit bad about that. Oh, I've got plans and ideas but that's all in my head and doesn't really count as work... That, other than continuing writing, is the next on the to do list. Printed a few pictures off at uni for a friend and realised I missed all the drawing and photoshopping that went with illustration so that's given me a bit of motivation for the blogsite designing:) Keep your eyes open for changes, but not too much cos I'm sure it'll all take a good while...

Thursday, 2 July 2009

Call me Steve Jobs...

Because I've got a job! Woooooo and indeed hoooooooo!
Which is really nice, actually. I've stopped living on so strict a budget for now and it's just so liberating!

Writing wise, I'm still in something of a slump. You know in cartoons and comics when there's a big fight and it ends up just like a cloud with legs and fists and things? Just random bits and dust dotted about around this cloud where nothing can be distinguished? That is what my brain is like at the moment. It's like some cartoon characters fighting in there.

As such, I'm going to make one kick ass huge To Do list, organise myself, and use the last week before I start work as fully as I can. Well, that's the plan anyway...

Friday, 26 June 2009

Meh.

Well, People's Friend isn't my friend any more! (Hurrah for puns!) They didn't like the story I sent them but to be honest, it would have been too easy to just send off something I had in stock and have them like it, when it wasn't originally aimed at them. We live we learn!

It's all a little bit depressing on the career front at the moment, in more ways than that one. I've had my job interview but won't hear until next week whether I've got it. Regardless of how well it seemed to go, I'm kind of convinced I haven't got it. Hmm, not the best attitude to have perhaps but you can't help how you feel!

Well this is a rather sombre post, but in happier news, I've been writing a little more - not so much as I should, I don't think, but still, I'm currently happy with what I've done. Need to plan more, figure out what to do with myself in the imminent etc etc. Reckon I'll put up a story on here shortly so I can start compiling a bit of a portfolio, so stay tuned!

Monday, 22 June 2009

ACTUAL work...

Well I've spent the weekend THINKING about work, which is all well and good but not a lot of ACTUAL work has been done...

That said, I have actually done some writing (woo). I started two shorts, one of which I abandoned early (for now at least) cos I realised it was crap... But the other one has, I feel, got a good stout pair of legs on it. I started it as aimed at the sort of women's short story magazine market, but now I've almost come to the central point of it, I'm kinda thinking it could go two ways... So I'm guna write two versions. The original idea, which, if I like it, I can send off to mags, and the new idea which, if I like that too, I'll put up here.

I'm finding it hard to settle down and get on with work at the moment, I don't really know why, guess it's just one of those things that happens some times. I've also been marginally working on what I'm guna call prettying up the blog, but again, just thinking and planning at this stage, nothing concrete.

Enough typing for now, I've just got an enormous scratch on my hand from the damned cat and it hurts to type!

Friday, 19 June 2009

XD

You know that stuff they say about time being a great healer? Well I'm not depressed anymore, so in this case it's all true! Depression is a weird thing, it creeps up on you, often when you least expect or need it. Especially when you least need it...

My more buoyant mood may be attributed to, among other things, the fact that I'm writing again. But on the other hand, I might be writing again cos I'm in a better mood... swings and roundabouts I guess.

Other contributing factors are probably my job interview on Wednesday!! I have to say I'm not overly hopeful, but despite my lack of conviction that I'll get it, the fact I have an interview at all is something of a boost.

I sent a story off to People's Friend yesterday... fingers crossed!!! Have decided to proceed thusly:

  1. Write target-specific short stories aimed at a woman's fiction market.
  2. Write a plethora (nice use of plethora) of short stories that aren't necessarily aimed at women, for blogsite use (yup, I'm persevering with blogsite)
  3. Think of more plans for my list...

Wednesday, 17 June 2009

Gah

I'm depressed *shakes fist at life*

Realised that what with all the planning and researching, I haven't actually done any writing for quite a few days now. WOE! So I got down to it and... nothing. Writer's block, whatever, I've got ideas but nothing that felt right for today. I don't know, keep trying I guess.

In happier news I'm submitting a story to People's Friend! I duno if they'll like it or not but I figure it's got to be worth a shot!

I'm STILL applying for jobs but nothing yet, I've been looking for over a month now and that's kinda depressing me too. Oh well, things can only get better... maybe....

Tuesday, 16 June 2009

Ooh, isn't it glossy?

I was thumbing through Vogue earlier, and isn't it glossy? I've never really thought about it before but the pages are SUPER glossy. Bit of a thin issue this month, but there was an adorably cute ad for Miss Dior perfume, which more than made up for it in my opinion XD

I entered the Vogue young writer competition this year, got a letter the other week back saying I hadn't made it through to the next round, which didn't really surprise me. There must be such an overwhelming response to it and before then I'd never really written any remotely journalistic articles before. I don't know if what I wrote was decent or not, might post it up later, it was all rather colloquial and maybe a bit too chatty. Well, we live we learn!

Been researching submitting to short story mags, I think I need a few 3000 word female orientated feel-good stories. I've got one at the moment, but it's kinda... male orientated but aimed at a female audience... so I duno if that'd be suitable *bangs head against wall*

It feels a bit stupid to be blogging about writing this and that when there's nothing up here to actually show I've ever written anything at all. I'm getting impatient but I want the blogsite (hell yeh, it's a website that's a blog.... I'm not entirely sure that word will catch on, woe!) to look pretty and I'm trying to write more shorts so I've something of a portfolio.

At the moment I've got a 75,000 word novel I wrote 2 years ago which I never want any one to see, ever, 2 complete short stories, half a dozen incomplete ones, and about 15,000 words of a novel I've been planning for the past two years. Doesn't seem like much, depressingly. It sounds like a cop out but for two and a half of the past three years I've been kidding myself I wanted to be an illustrator. It's always been art or books in my life, and I picked the wrong one! But on the plus side, I'm guna decorate this blog something silly haha. Dear N has promised to help me with the trickier formatting (ie that which isn't spelt out for me by blogger), but don't hold your breath for it looking professional, and dare I say, glossy, any time soon...

Monday, 15 June 2009

Castles in the air

Well, I'm still looking for jobs (I wish I was Steve Jobs). It's been over a month now and I've had one interview, which wasn't really an interview - the lady talked at me for 20 minutes then said my personality wasn't shining through enough... *bangs head against wall*

On a writing front (hurrah) I am full of ideas and happiness and plans, the blog will be prettied up, not having a website any more, it's all in motion, now the hard bit - I actually need to DO IT!

In other authorial news I bought a few short story mags and I'm planning on submitting to them, they must have a reasonably high turnover of authors, and to have my work in print would be amazing! But I'm just building castles in the air at the moment, must write more!

I like going out for meals, it is NICE to go out for meals in good company and eat nice things! Now I just need a job so going out for a meal last night isn't the last time I can afford to....

Sunday, 14 June 2009

So it begins

I had a blog before, but I got sick of it, mainly cos it consisted almost entirely of rubbish.
Now I have a blog again, which is a bit exciting.

Starting, and doing the first post is hard, I don't know what to put in and what to leave out.
So here are the basics:

I've just finished Uni
I'm looking for a job
(but really I'd like to be a writer)

The plan is iv got a blog and a facebook and a twitter and now I want a websiteXD hehe covering all the bases there!

Been writing short stories, or trying to -
a) because they're nice to do and
b) so I've a larger body of work to show for my time rather than just concentrating on THE BIG ONE, a full length novel I've been trying to write for almost a year.

The blog and website will hopefully tie in, there's guna end up (hopefully) being some pretty pictures on here as well, so the illustration degree wont have been a complete waste!

Not sure how I'm guna work this re: putting up stories though, they will hopefully be on the website, if I end up with one, or I could put them on the blog when they're finished.... HURRAH for disorganisation!

But yeh, stay tuned, hopefully....